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Facebook Page-HACKED! *oh my*

Written by SQC
Wednesday, 22 February 2012 18:19
Ok so I’ll admit I had always been a bit of a Facebook elitist and, by that, I mean that I’d always felt it was somewhat beneath me to associate myself with such an easily available and indiscriminate way of dealing with people. When I first heard of it my first inclination was to consider it just another juvenile distraction perpetuated to intoxicate the ignorant masses away from the more pressing issues facing mankind and being addressed by intellectuals like myself. I was NEVER going to join this cabal of aimless dummies with their sad addictions to their computer because I, Sara Contreras, had far too much sophistification and panache for such a mundane product of the social media. Well, let me tell you, that was then! My account was hacked twice and hijacked so badly by spammers it was disabled and I’M ABOUT TO LOSE MY F-----G MIND!!! I can’t connect to so many people for whom I have no other contact info. I never realized how genuinely dependent I’ve become to the abundant cache of information available at the touch of a button! I can’ sleep, can’t find anyone at their understaffed pathetic Customer Service to help me and I’m just so lost and sad. I wish I could post my FB page on the side of a milk container as “Lost and Missing” because I’m so desperate to find it and bring it home to where it belongs. The hacker assigned me a dummy page with 4, WHAT@@@!!!!, 4 friends, having jacked my 4,000+ FB family. My hacker even made me suffer the indignity of attaching the name “Saharah Contrerash as some cruel joke. If you get spam related to sneakers or shoes, please know it’s not me: I’d never promote sneakers and I’d never have an ‘h’ at the end of both first and last names. My hands are shaking, my nerves shot, and I’m like a captain at sea flailing about looking for safety. Oh wait, that was the guy on the Italian cruise ship! Bad analogy. I never expected to miss my FB page so much and this experience has served as a reminder to never take anything for granted. Wherever you are my darling FB account, please forgive me and come back to Mama. We never have to talk about this awful experience again and I promise to never forsake how truly wonderful and important you are to me. I love you Facebook page!
Last Updated on Wednesday, 22 February 2012 18:25

2012: HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Written by SQC
Saturday, 31 December 2011 13:03
It’s almost the new year and I wanted to take a few minutes to thank everyone who’s ever been to a show, bought a DVD or t-shirt, told a friend about me, friended me, Youtubed me, tweeted about me, followed my career, in any way supported comedy (especially Latino), or has just been a lover of laughter and the sharing of a really funny story. I promise this year will bring another round of the crazies and I know I will see many familiar faces. As far as resolutions are concerned, stick to the ones you can easily accomplish, like changing your sheets and calling your Mom more often. (I already do one but I’m not saying which.) Pledging yet again to lose 40 pounds in a few months can really be biting off more than you can chew (pun intended). Promising to exercise a little more and cut soda out completely is more reasonable and will likely give you a 10-15 pound head start for next year. (If you really think you could do the 40 pound thing, then please let me know and I will gladly share some of my secrets for healthy living. That’s my promise.) And, ladies, getting that pap or having a mammogram is also something that has more of a chance of happening than getting your baby’s father to fully disclose his off-the-books income in family court. Yes that ass should be doing more but nowadays you take what you can get since most of the judges are disgruntled ex-husbands themselves (especially in Bergen County, N.J.). I firmly believe that if you take care of your health somehow everything else works itself out. I know too many gracious and wonderful women who put everything before themselves and forgo the simplest methods for guaranteeing they’ll be around for their grandchildren. Make that promise to yourselves. So, what else do I promise for the New Year? To make networks notice me, change my home décor drastically, spend more time with my kids and parents, and be more honest with myself. Okay, the last three are more doable than the first because I might have to do a perp walk on the evening news to get ABC’s attention. But I will keep that pledge and still work hard at making it happen. I do believe it can. So to all those that also believe in all goals big and small, I wish a very Happy New Year.
Last Updated on Monday, 02 January 2012 02:24